I'll Be the Heavy. 'Cause He's Your Brother.

One of the strange things about ministry is when it has to involve meddling. Which it does sometimes. One of the situations that comes to mind is when an elderly person is aging and decisions need to be made. Perhaps there are no family members to address things like when it's time to stop driving or whether you really can stay home alone anymore. Perhaps it's something like one kid doing all the care-giving and another hardly being in touch who someone needs to call.

Sometimes it's about getting in touch with out-of-town kids who need to have the seriousness of a situation impressed upon them because non-relatives really aren't allowed to make decisions like moving into a nursing home.

There are very few people who are comfortable inserting themselves into other family's lives in these ways. And I doubt most ministers are either. But sometimes we have to, and we do, and it's the role that carries us in there, not anything about us personally. Sometimes someone has to step in and be the heavy, and having a collar (even if it's figurative) makes that easier.

I say all this because I'm sensing I may need to be gearing up to do it again soon. Delicacy and weight at the same time is a complicated combination to convey over the phone. It gets easier with practice, thank God! Part of it is that one of the things a minister can do for a family is give them someone else to be mad at so they don't have to stay mad at each other. A crappy role to play, but sometimes a true gift. And since it's not really about you, it's easier to let go of than having a member of your family mad at you.